I was millions of miles away from home, surrounded by the most breathtakingly terrifying creatures I could have ever imagined. The camera in my hands shake as I try to document their existence. I’m standing feet away from a herd of grazing Halzecs. Their heads tower two feet above me while they eat the fluorescent pink grass. “Xy, watch out!” my partner and fellow astronaut, Eckley warns.
I duck as the long tail of a halzec spins toward me. I snap a photo of the black and blue striped tail that ends in a sharp spear-like point. I back away as a mother approaches with two small calves. I lay onto my stomach to capture the family dinging together, their pear-shaped heads with sharp horns on top, pointed directly at me.
Suddenly I hear my partner chuckle and feel a tug on my shirt. Moisture creeps through my thin earth shirt material and I slowly rollover. I find a male staring inches away from my face. Green slime drips from its mouth and instantly grosses me out. I hear a snap of a camera as the halzec leans closer. A large, pale object flops out of its mouth and before I can react, it rubs across my face. “Yes!” Eckley cheers, snapping a photo.
The herd freezes and their heads snap toward us. “Stampede!” she exclaims.
I launch to my feet, and sprint through the tall grass, as the herd chases us. Their heavy bodies rock the ground like an earthquake causing us to launch into the air. I grab ahold of a thick vine and swing myself over the blur of blue and black. The stampede passes and I hear Eckley cackling proudly. She is sitting in a Multree that is painted with the most breath-taking flowers I’ve ever seen. She is staring into her camera screen and laughing uncontrollably. “National Geographic will love this one!” she exclaims.
Eckley turns the camera toward me and I gasp at the photo of the giant, disgusting tongue licking my face. “Gross,” I state, instinctively wiping my face with my slime covered shirt.
I gag and slide down the vine, desperate to wash my face. I dust off my earth pants from all the dust stirred by the halzecs and walk toward the hovering spacecraft. Eckley pilots us, and in a blink of an eye, we dock at our designated spot and are greeted by American soldiers.
Wait… Aliens still do not exist on earth? Well, they will. My name is Xyquarious, let me guide you through the galaxy!